My Jenn-eration

I am a Democrat, a die-hard liberal. If you cut me, do I not need bleed blue? So no one was more surprised than me when I married Phil, a Republican. Now, he claims he is not affiliated and is an Independent but I’ve caught him furtively watching Fox News just enough times now to guess which way he swings. While most married couples often fight about the dishes or late night feedings, our worst disagreements have been about social security, national security, or global warming.   Were I not so heatedly discussing why Ronald Reagan is in fact not the greatest president ever, I might even be able to laugh at how ridiculous we must seem. I met Phil about a month before George W. Bush was re-elected to his second term. At the time, I told him that if he won he probably wouldn’t hear from me again because I was intending to take a row boat to Canada. Our first date was just days after he won re-election. When he attempted to broach the subject over drinks I told him: “Not yet, the ...

Sometimes I feel that Special Agent Oso provides enough care for my children that he could qualify as a sister wife.   I feel ridiculous even writing it, but as I watched Oso gently soothe my exhausted children on a Friday afternoon while I made dinner, I couldn’t shake the feeling. This must be what it’s like to have a sister wife, a partner to pitch in during those relatively innocuous but super tricky times of day when everyone, most of all you, is super tired and is just without the patience or wherewithal to work out how to make it all better. I'm Jewish. And, as far as I know, there is little evidence of plural marriage and Judaism having any connection in history. That said, I can’t help but wonder sometimes – could there be something real here that I’m missing out on? Just imagine: another woman or women as the case may be who serves as a partner in all ways to help you grow, protect, and nurture your children. I mean – I guess in theory that’s what a spouse or par...

On any almost any given day, I read or hear something that makes me question my choice to be a stay-at-home mom. I never for a second regret the decision. I love getting a chance to have this fleeting time with my kids when they are little. It’s never the choice I regret. It’s the way I feel—my reflection of other people’s judgment about this choice, which I struggle with on an almost daily basis.   It’s usually a relatively innocuous statement or an article either hinting or overtly stating that by staying home with my kids, I’ve turned my back on the feminist movement, that I’ve lost my own identity, and that I’m some sort of throwback to a time and place that doesn’t exist anymore. And it usually makes me feel uncomfortable and not more than a little angry.   The one that set me off today was a throwaway piece written by a woman and posted by a female friend on how marketers today no longer market to the traditional stay-at-home mom because she no longer exists. In...

Two good friends welcomed two beautiful babies into the world today. They are still affectionately known as Huggy and Snuggy - they haven't yet revealed their names. But in thinking about the wonderful family they were born into and all they have to look forward to, I penned this open letter to them. Dear Huggy and Snuggy- Welcome to the world! We’ve all been waiting for so many months now to meet you, no one more than your two beautiful mamas. Lots of people will be showering your moms with all special gifts, toys and platitudes by the barrelful, but amidst all that I thought I’d take a second to offer you some of those special words of wisdom. Go Easy on Them Your moms won’t always get it right, but they’ll always do their best to make it right because the love they have experienced in getting to know you over these past few hours is unlike anything they’ve ever known. It is all-consuming and terrifying and amazing love, and with each minute more that they know you, they...