Skip to main content

Wait – Why the Cluck Are We All Talking About Chikn?

And more importantly, why do we all keep spelling chicken that way? Are we all in on the joke or the conspiracy? Seriously – what’s up with that? But I digress. This post isn’t about chikn or chicken. It’s about two very important things I strongly believe:  1) all Americans deserve the same equal rights, and 2) without question liberals have absolutely zero political savvy and are the stupidest people on the planet. And I say that as a liberal.

Let’s start with the second point here, for no other reason than the consistent misspelling of the word chicken is making me feel more stupid so I’ve decided to do things in the wrong order. Why are we so bad at this? Why didn’t we see a cheap publicity stunt trap being set for us a by a chicken warlord? Why did we all fall for it?! What the cluck! Here’s a shocker people: the proud patriarch papa of a southern based bible belt fried chicken joint gives lots of his private profits to support the Defense of Marriage act and other efforts to solidify that marriage is defined legally as between a man and a woman, and to thereby strip the entire LGBT community of the right to marry. Raise your hand if you are surprised by this? So then, Mr. Top Chickn or Chicken or whatever decides to give an interview where he speaks openly about where his chicken money goes. And what do we all do? We act freaking surprised and self-righteous, which, by the way if you are wondering is exactly what Mr. Chicken thought we would do. And then suddenly you have Mayors stepping out of the woodwork saying that Mr. Chicken can’t sell his chicken in their cities because of what he believes (which by the way people, is I’m pretty sure illegal – you know blocking someone from making a living based on what they say or believe) – that’s right, I’m looking at you Menino. And voila! You have Dan Cathy’s dream – the silly liberals running around talking about boycotting chicken and guess what you have, not a logical engagement on the importance of ensuring civil rights for all? Nope – you’ve got a debate on freedom of speech and religious freedom. And everyone is shelling out their money to buy waffle fries in support of Dan Cathy’s right to free speech. Um, is anyone catching the utter stupidity and irony of this?!
Why, oh why dear liberals do we always fall for such obvious schemes? Why do we always muck it up. This was a well timed PR scheme from the beginning. It was never a debate about the rights of Gays and Lesbians to marry. And we walked right into it. We run around pointing fingers at others who threaten to, let’s say hypothetically boycott JC Penney for hiring Ellen DeGeneres as a spokeswoman, and then we argue to do the same thing when it supports our own point?! It’s like saying the other side is a bunch of religious hypocrites who are really total pervs who cheat on their wives, and then TWEETING PICTURES OF YOUR GENITALS. Why do we do this stuff, liberals? Seriously, why?
It makes us look dumb and it makes us look like hypocrites and it obscures really excellent points about how folks, particularly folks who are strict constructionists, ought to ensure that they apply the same strict constitutional approach when reading that beloved doc as it applies to the equal right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness by all Americans. Not just the straight ones.
Let’s get to the point. I think Dan Cathy is a total stool pigeon. I think he is about as smart as one of his chickens right before they become the spicy chicken sandwich deluxe. So I don’t eat there because he was smart enough to tell me exactly where my chicken money would go, and I think that’s crap. But calling for a boycott or a kiss-in or being all surprised when the whole debate gets re-framed on you just proves that once again liberals, we looked silly and outplayed. This debate is important and serious. It involves the loves and lives of our parents, friends, neighbors, children who deserve equal rights in this country – the right to marry. By no means should any of us be talking about chikn. Or chicken. Ah F*(&^&*^!!! it.




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Rachel Hollis' Instagram is The Bad Place

  Women, mothers, pull up a chair.  I wish to have a word with you about Rachel Hollis, toxic positivity, and women as a commodity.  Do you know Rachel Hollis? She is a self proclaimed motivational speaker and life coach. She has nearly 2 million followers on Instagram, has published multiple NY Times bestsellers, and runs her own business, has a product line in Target, a clothing line on QVC, her own fitness app, and sells out large convention size stadiums where people pay $40 for a general ticket or up to $200 per person for a VIP pass that will give them things like “digital swag” (those two words together form a new one that has an unclear meaning to me), and video playback on all speakers. Rachel Hollis is a business and the thing that she is selling? Why that’s you. It wasn’t always this way. As one of the few bloggers still kicking around that started out nearly nine years ago, many of us old folks can tell you how quickly the landscape of personal essays and blogging changed.
13 comments
Read more

Distracted Living

Last week, I almost killed my daughter. It started off as really any other week ever does. My husband had been travelling pretty much non-stop for nearly the entire month. Whether we wanted to or not, we were all falling into a fairly regular rhythm without him, at least Monday-Friday. With school and activities and for better or worse, the days seemed to move rather quickly but by evening all three of us were stretched thin. Collectively, we all seemed to peek at maximum crabbiness somewhere around 6pm. It was shortly after this time last Wednesday night that I brought the kids upstairs to help them get washed up for bed. My daughter had an upset stomach for most of the day but I hadn’t thought much of it. She was otherwise happy and playing and generally herself. I did know that she was very tired. Still, we were a good hour and a half from her usual bedtime of around 8pm. I put her in the bath and let it start to fill and left the room to go start the shower for my son. This is
45 comments
Read more

Want to be a Digital Mentor For Your Kids? Step 1: Admit You Know Nothing

I’m scanning through my Facebook newsfeed during a 25 minute long episode of Dora in the City when the new AAP recommendations on screen time catch my eye. The guidelines include revised screen time recommendations for children ages 6 and up, from two hours a day to no official screen time limit. Rather, the panel recommends prioritizing homework, physical activity, extracurricular activities, family meal times, and after all that whatever is left can be dedicated to screen time. It makes an important distinction between media for educational use versus entertainment, and encourages families to seek and find their own balance with technology. Parents, it recommends, are to assume the role as “media mentor.” Toward this end, the panel made an additional recommendation specifically geared toward parents and their own technology use, reminding us to put down devices during meal time and parent child playtimes. The recommendations came out at the right time, as I had been turning ov
4 comments
Read more